First Week After Separation: Complete Survivor Guide

Bottom Line Up Front

Your first week as a civilian is critical. You're establishing new identity, starting new career/school, managing emotions, and building new routines. This guide ensures you succeed in this transition.

Day 1: First Day of Civilian Career

Morning (Before First Day)

• Wake up on time (set alarm 30 min early)
• Eat healthy breakfast
• Shower and groom professionally
• Dress in prepared professional outfit
• Collect bag/materials for first day
• Leave 15 minutes earlier than needed

Arrival

• Arrive 10-15 minutes early
• Park and locate correct entrance
• Check in at reception/reporting location
• Smile and introduce yourself confidently
• Be enthusiastic about opportunity

First Day Activities

• Complete I-9 and tax paperwork (if job)
• Meet manager and immediate team
• Get office tour and assigned workspace
• Understand building systems (bathroom, parking, etc.)
• Get contact info for key people
• Take notes on expectations
• Ask clarifying questions

End of Day

• Confirm tomorrow's schedule and time
• Get directions if first day was confusing
• Thank people who helped you settle in
• Reflect on first day (note what went well)
• Prepare for day 2 (outfit, breakfast)

Days 2-5: First Full Week

Daily Routine

• Wake at same time daily (establish routine)
• Healthy breakfast before leaving
• Arrive 5-10 minutes early
• Professional dress daily
• Complete assigned tasks
• Build relationships with colleagues
• Ask questions when unclear
• Take notes and learn
• Stay until expected end time
• Reflect on day (what did you learn?)

Relationship Building

• Introduce yourself to colleagues in your area
• Eat lunch with coworkers (if social culture)
• Attend any team events or meetings
• Ask people questions about their roles
• Remember names and key info about people
• Start building work relationships
• Be friendly and approachable

Work Performance

• Do what's asked with excellence
• Ask for clarification if unclear
• Complete tasks on time
• Go above and beyond on first projects
• Ask for feedback
• Take notes on processes and expectations
• Under-promise, over-deliver

Evening Routine

• Establish healthy routine (dinner, exercise, sleep)
• Limit work thinking (turn off after hours)
• Connect with family or friends
• Get good sleep (7-8 hours)
• Prepare for next day

Managing Emotions: Normal First Week Feelings

What You Might Feel

1. Excitement - "I'm starting something new!"
2. Anxiety - "What if I'm not good at this?"
3. Loss - "I miss military routine"
4. Uncertainty - "Am I making the right choice?"
5. Fatigue - "This is mentally exhausting"
6. Nostalgia - "I miss my military friends"

These Feelings Are Normal

✓ Everyone experiences transition emotions ✓ Emotions pass as you settle in ✓ You've handled challenges before ✓ First week is always hardest ✓ By week 3-4, you'll feel much better

Managing Emotions

• Connect with other new hires: You're not alone
• Reach out to military friends: Stay connected (doesn't mean you're not moving on)
• Journal or reflect: Process your feelings
• Exercise: Stress relief and health
• Sleep well: Crucial for emotional regulation
• Eat healthy: Impacts mood and energy
• Reach out for support: If overwhelmed, talk to someone

Financial Realities of First Week

Income Side

• Military pay stopped (terminal leave ended)
• First civilian paycheck won't arrive yet (usually 2-4 weeks)
• No more military housing allowance
• May need to use emergency fund for first month

Expense Side

• Rent/mortgage due
• Utilities bills arriving
• Groceries and food
• Transportation
• Healthcare (if using VA, costs less)

Managing Finances First Week

• Know exact date of first paycheck
• Budget using emergency fund for gap
• Prioritize essential expenses (housing, food, utilities)
• Defer non-essentials until first paycheck
• Use emergency fund strategically
• Don't panic—most have planned for this

Establishing New Routines

Morning Routine (30-45 min)

1. Wake at consistent time
2. Shower and get ready
3. Healthy breakfast
4. Dress professionally
5. Leave on time

Work Day Routine

1. Arrive 5-10 min early
2. Check email/messages
3. Review day's priorities
4. Execute work
5. End on time, disconnect

Evening Routine (After Work)

1. Quick decompression time
2. Exercise or walk
3. Healthy dinner
4. Prep next day
5. Wind down for bed
6. Consistent sleep time

Sleep Routine

• Consistent bedtime
• Consistent wake time
• 7-8 hours nightly (critical)
• Limit screens before bed
• Cool, dark bedroom
• No work thoughts before sleep

Handling Common First Week Challenges

Challenge 1: "I Feel Lost"

Normal: New environment, new people, new expectations Solution: Ask questions, take notes, be patient with yourself

Challenge 2: "I Miss My Military Friends"

Normal: Loss of strong bonds and familiar structure Solution: Reach out to military friends, build new civilian friendships, connect with veteran groups

Challenge 3: "I'm Exhausted"

Normal: Mental and emotional load of transition Solution: Get adequate sleep, exercise, don't overextend yourself

Challenge 4: "I Don't Understand My Job"

Normal: Every new job requires learning curve Solution: Ask manager for clarification, take detailed notes, observe experienced colleagues

Challenge 5: "I Don't Fit In"

Normal: Different culture, different people, different norms Solution: Give it 2-3 weeks, build relationships, observe culture, be yourself

Challenge 6: "I Made the Wrong Choice"

Normal: Transition doubt is common in week 1 Solution: Wait until week 2-3 before evaluating, give yourself adjustment time, focus on today

First Week Checklist

Physical Health

• Eating healthy meals
• Getting 7-8 hours sleep
• Exercising or moving body
• Staying hydrated
• Managing stress

Mental Health

• Processing transition emotions
• Reaching out for support if needed
• Journaling or reflecting
• Maintaining positive mindset
• Being kind to yourself

Career Performance

• Completing assigned tasks
• Building workplace relationships
• Learning job expectations
• Asking questions
• Making positive impression

Logistics

• Housing settled
• Utilities working
• Address updated
• First paycheck on track
• Emergency fund ready

Milestone: End of Week 1

✅ You made it through first day! ✅ You're establishing routines ✅ You're meeting new people ✅ You're learning new job/school ✅ You're adjusting to civilian life

Rest, reflect, and prepare for week 2.

Week 2-4 Outlook

Week 2: Gaining confidence, routines solidifying, relationships forming Week 3: Feeling more comfortable, starting to enjoy new role Week 4: Beginning to feel like you belong, adjusting to new normal

Support Resources Available

Immediate (Week 1):

• New employer/school resources
• Military One Source (still available for 180 days post-separation)
• Veterans crisis line (988 then 1)
• Veteran friends and support groups

Ongoing:

• New job EAP (employee assistance program)
• College counseling services
• VA healthcare
• Local veteran organizations
• Online veteran communities

Success Indicators (End of Week 1)

✓ You showed up all 5 days ✓ You followed instructions ✓ You were professional ✓ You asked questions when needed ✓ You didn't quit (even if hard) ✓ You're sleeping at new location ✓ You're starting to know people's names ✓ You have plan for week 2

If You're Really Struggling

If emotions are overwhelming:

• Call Veterans Crisis Line: 988 then press 1
• Contact Military One Source (available until 6 months post-sep)
• Reach out to military friends
• Talk to new manager about adjustments needed
• Consider counseling (free options available)

You're not alone. Transition is hard. But you've got this.

Key Reminders

• First week is always hardest
• Normal to feel anxious, uncertain, exhausted
• You have military experience—you know how to adapt
• Give yourself 2-4 weeks to settle
• Reach out for support if needed
• Be kind to yourself during transition
• Focus on today, not tomorrow's worries
• You're building new civilian identity

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Welcome to civilian life! You survived the military; you'll thrive in your civilian career. Be patient with yourself. Week 2 will be easier.